A “nice to myself” day

After the mistakes of yesterday, today I took steps to make things better.

It started a little iffy because I didn’t get out of bed until lunch, but then I felt a nice lightness when I did get up (partially because my meds weren’t late – I took them when I was up to feed the cat).

I had a shower and then lunch. I saw the nice juicy tomatoes I bought the other day, so I had a toasted tomato sandwich. Mmmm.

After that I went to yoga. It wasn’t a strenuous class by any means, but it got me out of the house and then moving which felt great.

Then I really spoiled myself. I splurged and got my first facial since I was in Asia. I’d thought about it for a few days this week because my skin was so dry and unhappy, especially with all of the allergies. I was feeling unkept and tired looking at work. And I worried a little about wasting this weekend and not leaving the house.

So I decided to treat myself. I needed to relax and be pampered and feel good about myself. I didn’t want to keep pointing my tired, red face out at the world. Especially if I need to gear up for interviews. As it stands right now I have two more weeks of work. They *might* extend again, but no more than a month at most as the project will be done by then.

Luckily there are quite a few jobs to apply to this week so I’m trying to apply to one per day this weekend.

So here I am. I’m hungry for dinner but after that I want to tackle some of my homework. Fingers crossed that the energy extends that far!

Do you find doing something nice for your outer self to be helpful to your inner self?


Today’s yogi tea message

This weekend sucked. It was my first weekend off and I had all these plans. I had to do some stuff for work but I was going to do it at the gym on an exercise bike and at a coffee shop while sipping a latte. I was going to go to the yoga classes I can’t normally attend while training. I was going to rest and I was going to have fun and recharge.

I didn’t leave the house and barely left my bed.

There was a point on Sunday morning where I almost turned things around. But I think I made a conscious decision not to.

Why do I keep doing this?

My only bursts of activity on the weekend came when I was cleaning on Saturday night and, on Sunday night, when I finally showered and tried to figure out how to do all that I was supposed to have done over the weekend.

Unsurprisingly, I had insomnia last night and then I was exhausted and pretty useless today.

But I did go to work. For me, being there in body is just as important as being there in mind, because attendance is a challenge for me. I only have a few more weeks to this contract, so I’m determined not to miss any more time.

I’m hoping that this weekend was to get the blahs out of the way so that I can actually do stuff on Easter weekend. We shall see.

Which brings me my tea. The inspiring message attached to my yogi tea just now is this:

Those who live in the past limit their future.

So I continue to move forward. But I don’t want to keep repeating the same unhealthy behaviour. So please help remind me on Easter weekend to be active, to live in the moment, and to not procrastinate. Rest does not mean turning into a sloth and avoiding things that will make you happy.

On that note, I’d best get to sleep so that tomorrow makes for a much better day.

DBH xx

Taking Stock

1. I am stressed. I feel it building. My psoriasis is acting up. I need to address this. The reasons, I think, are financial, the pressures of my course and the general lack of long term stability in my life.

2. Tomorrow I have my first day off in weeks! Yay!

3. I readjusted my priorities this week, but as a result I succeeded in going to neither yoga nor the gym.

4. Though I have this weekend “off” I have important things to do: prepare my first yoga class and also prepare for a work-related test.

5. Allergies have been plaguing me this week. To the point where my colleagues are concerned. I think I am susceptible because I am run down.

6. I have perfect attendance at work and everyone is happy with my work. There were a few days this week where I didn’t want to go to work as I was run down, but I quickly overcame the temptation. This is a major improvement.

7. I’ve been trying to take care of myself this week and get more sleep, but I’m still frequently tired. I’ve relied on caffeine. Haven’t been able to watch a full movie.

8. I’m worried that I’ll go off track this weekend. Follow my old pattern of getting stressed and staying in bed and not doing anything productive to help with my assignments and my studying.

9. I’m afraid that I’m nearing the end of a job competition and may come to the point where I don’t get yet another job. I really need that feeling of security you get from a long term job with benefits.

10. I’m feeling guilty for being a financial burden on my parents now that new unexpected bills have cropped up.

11. I’m feeling close to people in my training program but like I’m losing touch with my friends.

12. I feel really fat and I’m frustrated that something is holding me back from going to the gym.

13. The tension in my jaws has been frequent this week.

14. I hope to stay/get back on track this weekend.

15. Daylight savings time begins this weekend. I’m not looking forward to losing an hour of sleep. But I’m really looking forward to there being sun later in the day. Bring on spring! I’m so done with snow and subzero temperatures!